The Zoo over Ambuscade Street

Please, please, please do not come into my office and start screaming at me about being wrong when the information you have is over a month old, and the information I have is a week old and delivered to me with a pile of Official Paperwork. Because, you know, you'll just piss me off. And then I'll cease trying to be helpful because you started yelling and hurling accusations right off the bat.

Hello Monday. And I forgot the thingee I need to get into all the databases I need to update before I can get away with taking the rest of the month off, so I'm already behind schedule for the week. And Boss Man's gone until Wednesday, and Fu-Master's gone until Thursday, so I can't even get an update on what's going on and what happened last week.

Lalala...It's so good to be back. (I really didn't expect to get a chance to use this particular icon so soon. Kyo++)

My father persistently refuses to drop off the face of the earth. Although Dakota is a pretty good attempt. Not only that, but he persists in sending me stupid forwards. Really stupid forwards. Like "OMG THIS WAS ON THE FRONT PAGE OF USA TODAY!!!11one (yes, it really said this, minus the caps and ones) BILL GATES IS GIVING AWAY MONEY IF YOU FORWARD THIS TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW!!!! I DIDN'T BELIEVE IT UNTIL I GOT MY CHECK for $22,457!!!oneoneoneone (it really said that, too). It took me years to train everyone I know to not send me stupid forwards, only the Really Amusing ones, and only a few people are trusted to be Arbiters of Good Humor (Jeremy, I'm looking at you). I don't have the willpower to deal with my father for that long. Just thinking about him stresses me out and makes me want to break something.

(I had this fantastic theory at one point, something like fifteen pages with citations, that there was only South Dakota, and North Dakota was just something they made up to get additional federal funding, but I lost it somewhere along the way.)

Goal for tomorrow: To use the phrase "You bet!" at least three times at inappropriate points in the conversation, and to use the phrase "I'm jake" at any point. (Bonus points to anyone who gets both references, although some of you have an unfair advantage)