The Zoo over Ambuscade Street

I'm back. It was an interesting trip, where many things happened that I'll write about later. However, in the meantime, I'll leave you with this poem written by Jake Forbes, former editor at Tokyopop (one of the good ones), after he ruined Christmas last year (no dust jackets on Fruits Basket):

'Twas the night before Christmas, and up in my room
The Keroro battalion was plotting your doom.

"These humans," I said, "are distracted by mirth.
While they're busy with presents we'll conquer the Earth!"

As we thought of our victory, we cackled with glee,
And sipped at our tumblers of hot oolong tea.

"But what is this Christmas?" I thought to myself.
"There must be more to it than Will Farrell's Elf."

Tamama with his notebook and I with my Mac,
Proceeded to research before the attack.

After checking my mail and updating my blog
I proceeded to Yahoo (preferred search tool of frogs).

I typed the word "Christmas" on translucent keys.
And what should I find but one million entries!

I narrowed my searching with newfound conviction,
perusing the results of "Donner" and "Blitzen."

I read about Santa and fruitcake and stockings,
And how Pokopenians subject trees to flocking.

We came to this planet to bring widespread dread,
But as I fell asleep, I dreamt kindness instead.

My research completed, I held new meeting,
But a definite gloom hovered o'er the proceedings.

"If we conquer the Earth, Santa Claus will be miffed!"
Said Private Tamama, "He won't bring us gifts!"

And Corporal Giroro had concerns of his own.
"Christmas time is for lovers; maybe we should postpone."

"That's right!" I proclaimed. "We don't have to act now!
"Let these fools have their Christmas, the last joy we'll allow!"

"Besides," I admonished. "Pokopen is united.
"To attack at this time would be very short-sighted."

So your planet was spared...if just for one day.
But maybe...just maybe...I prefer it that way.

*purrr*

They will be mine, oh yes. And some of them will be framed, since I have far more blank wall than I thought I did. Lots of blank wall that needs pretty pictures.

Yea, so, back from Sunny San Diego, where the weather was...much like it is here in Spotsylvania VA. Admittedly it's a bit unseasonably warm here, but nothing that far out of the norm.

It was...an odd trip. Exceedingly odd. I'll gloss over the work part of it, save that it was frustrating and what we learned is going to lead to a Huge Amount of Work to do in the next few weeks. It also cemented my desire to take three weeks off work this month, just because I can. Monday, Andrea and I stuck it out until lunch, when we ditched the conference and headed in the general direction of Old Town. We got trapped in the Bazzar del Mundo, where I proceeded to do just about all of my Christmas shopping. Yay! We ate dinner at one of the mexican restaurants there, where I had some seasonal cheese and green chile tamales, and a turkey tamale (turkey, nuts, rasins, and apples, covered in a mole sauce - far better than it sounds all around). It was well worth the trip out there.

Wednesday - we lasted for almost two hours, when Certain People said Certain Things that pissed us off so badly that we had to leave, or someone was getting hurt (note to presenters: When you do something Really Stupid that makes other people's lives a living hell for weeks on end, and then you get in front of a group of thosands, including many of these people, don't offer to let them come up and punch you, because reactionary people like me are likely to take you up on your offer). That wasn't actually the proverbial straw, but it was worth noting (Proverbial straw: When you're the supposed expert on a small facet of a huge project, and you're giving a presentation on it, and you're asked an easy question, I-the-lowly-BPOC-user shouldn't be able to answer it when you can't. Right). We spent the early part of the afternoon in the Gaslamp District, which is much less cool than it sounds. We bought chocolate, half-pound chocolate-chip cookies (I still have over half of mine left, after gnawing at it on the airplane for several hours), and a gigantic pillow. It was one of those funky fascinating ones I can play with for hours, of a large enough size for Erik's big head. It wasn't until we were on the trolley back to the hotel that I started to wonder how, exactly, I planned to get this thing home, especially considering all the shopping I had done the night before. Yea, not so smart. Even with my l33t packing skills, I can only defy the laws of mass and dimension so much before it all starts to fall apart.

I also napped at some point Wednesday, since my body stubbornly refused to believe it was really 3AM when I woke up, and refused to let me sleep in to a resonable hour. No jet lag on the return though, which was nice.

Friday was a much shorter day - much was said that is going to piss off Boss Man greatly (who called me repeatedly on Monday and Tuesday, asking about stuff I couldn't do anything about in California. I told him to do whatever it took to shut EDS up and make them happy - I just don't care anymore at this point, damnit, this project has sucked up enough of my life and free time over the past 6-7 weeks, and it's not getting any more so help me god! No more 70 hour weeks! I feel so much better getting that off my chest). The first presenter was useless, and the second should have been helpful but wasn't. so we left about ten minutes into that. An hour and ten minutes, rock on! I still get paid for a full day either way. We shopped some more - in the mall this time? An open-air mall without a roof is a strange and unhealthy thing.

I also splurged and got a spa pedicure and my hair cut by a man named Jon Paul with a pair of thousand dollar scissors. I'm so not making that up. I had no idea that cutting hair was such a lucrative business, or that it required such expensive tools. He gets to go overseas far more frequently than I do as well, which made me bitter. But I now sport bangs, hair much shorter than it was, and...curls, although he didn't do anything to make my hair curly. It's fascinating.

Then I flew home. The planes were on time and not delayed, wonder of wonders, Erik was actually waiting for me at the airport, wonder of wonders, and neither of my bags were lost or damaged at all. Although they felt the urge to not only search my bags (I bet it took them an hour to get everything back in it, suckers!), but they also searched a bag of bath salts in my luggage. The hell? It's salt, guys, it's not going to blow up the damn airplane.

Ah well, that was far less interesting than I had hoped. I'm glad to be back home, but not glad to be going back to work. Although I am looking forward to seeing the collective faces of Boss Man and Fu-Master (dear god don't let him be promoted to be my new supervisor!) when I tell them that I'm just back for next week, see you in January. Except I won't, because Boss Man's taking most of January off. Ha ha!